Cultivate Joy

Summer is here! My favorite season is one of long, lingering days in the garden. When I say linger, it sounds relaxing - like a tall glass of lemonade while strolling through beds of flowers. It is like that sometimes, but often it looks more like labor. Most of the time, when I'm cultivating my garden, it is more like sweat dripping down my face, hands in the dirt, and sticks in my hair. Cultivating requires work. The Definition of Cultivate is to promote or improve the growth of (a plant, crop, etc.) by labor and attention. I like that - To promote growth by labor and attention. Sometimes that's hard, but the outcome is worth it. Aren't the essential parts of our life worth labor and attention? Relationships, our jobs, our health, our attitudes - which could include joy all require cultivation.

After our daughter Nicole went to Heaven, I felt like joy was elusive, a luxury that was not meant for me. For quite some time, my heart was so heavy with sorrow that I couldn't imagine feeling joyful again. As time passed, the sharpness of grief softened, and my heart began to experience a measure of healing. A sprout of the possibility of experiencing joy again was planted in my heart. But, somehow, it felt wrong - like I was forgetting about my girl. My girl, who had brought so much joy into my life. If I were to experience joy again, would I be diminishing the significance of losing her?

Eventually, I began to understand that no, experiencing joy wasn't diminishing Nicole's memory. It was actually honoring her wonderful, beautiful life. But joy doesn't just happen; I had to and am still learning to pursue it, chase it, and even cultivate it.

What does it look like to cultivate joy? It could be about loosening the hardened soil of our hearts by acknowledging that it's okay to pursue joy. Then, planting the good seed of gratitude and sweet memories of our loved one who is no longer with us. When the weeds of bitterness, anger, and darkness sprout up - and they will - ruthlessly pull them up by the root and get rid of them. Then tenderly tend to joy, cupping her fragile blooms in your hands with reverence.  

It doesn't happen all at once. Sitting in grief and experiencing every painful part of it is essential for our healing. But when the sprout of joy visits our hearts. Embrace it, welcome it, and cultivate it. Joy is God's gift to us. Only through Him can we experience true joy and peace.

Romans 15:13

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.